Thursday, July 25, 2019

ARE YOU A YELLING MUMMY.

ways to control angry child"WHEN LITTLE PEOPLE ARE OVERWHELMED BY BIG EMOTIONS, ITS OUR JOB TO SHARE OUR CALM, NOT JOIN IN THEIR CHAOS-LR KNOST



Children are the source of energy in the house, they bring happiness and joy in family. Almost every mom falls in category of yelling mom at some point of time. We want to make parenting so perfect that we often forget how hard steps we are taking on the kids to make it possible. We don't want to get judged by the society, hence get over strict and stressed. Is it even required?



Perfect mother is a myth and its perfectly fine if your child is not as good as other child. Pressurising and yelling will take them nowhere and they will start following the same behavioral gestures for others. Parents are the role model of child and they religiously follow their parents. This is a fact that children adapt wrong things easily and take years to adapt good habits.

The victims of our furious nature are our own kids. They cry, scream and still come to us for our love and hugs and then we feel ashamed and guilty of our nature towards them.

Our uncontrolled aggression makes them stubborn, anger has no purpose and it can never solve the issue. It puts full stop on communication between child and mom.

When kids throw tantrums and doesn't listen it means they are upset about something and they don't know how to express. So being the mom, its our responsibility to figure it out. Be quiet and calm and wait for the child to calm down, that's the only solution. If the child is screaming and you start yelling, the situation gets worse. Punishment is not the solution, explanation is. My 3.5 year old daughter always say please explain me and not shout at me :).

I also completely understand the fact that mothers are stressed and frustrated full day and then children become the soft target. Children follow the behavior they are raised with, don't make them follow your aggressive nature for no big reason. Children need love and affection and someone who can hear them with no judging. they are the purest souls on earth. I know its easy said than done but with simple gestures we can win them. After rejecting many wombs, they have come in yours so think there is a reason to it.

They are too small to understand us in the exact way we want. so take it easy. the kids who need most of the love will ask for it in the best unloving ways.

"Anybody can become angry- that is easy, but to be angry with the right person and to the right degree and at the right time and for the right purpose and in the right way that is not within everybody's power and is not easy". Children definitely are not the right person to show your anger. 

To raise a happy and a calm child, the mother needs to be calm and happy. So be a healthy and a happy mom.

Few tips to handle an angry child-

1. Make stories to follow your instructions. Like there is  tree outside and a sleeping baba lives on that tree, he checks on the children who are not sleeping so lets sleep or he will come and catch you.

2. Distract the child by talking about entirely different topic. Like whenever my daughter gets angry, I always start discussing about her upcoming birthday and she forgets our conflict issue and join me in the discussion. Try it.

3. Count- general rule says 1-10 but here we are talking about our kids so count 1-20

4. Take a deep breath and free yourself from the place for few minutes. Adding anger to anger only adds fuel to the fire.

"RAISE THE HAPPY HUMANS".




2 comments:

  1. good one shifali,i actually do all the above things which you have suggested in your blog..also my kid is 4+ now never ever slapped him in these much years...its all about patience and the way u treat ur kid..bw nicely written..keep it up..

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  2. Thanks Ruchi...we women's have the most important responsibility in life and that is nurturing other human on earth.

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